Second on my list of “Things I really hate”, - no toilet paper in a public toilet. (Public toilets being number one.) If you’re lucky, you have a tissue in your pocket or purse. Such was the luck of “Gertrude” (fictitious name to protect her embarrassment) last week.
Gertrude arrived home and felt something was dreadfully wrong down there. Yes, there. Compact mirror in hand she investigated. “GOOD LORD!” exclaimed Gertrude. “ I’ve got a tumor on my hoo-hoo!” Reaching down to investigate further, she realized, (pardon my pun) her lips were sealed. Further probing revealed a sticky mass covering not only her hoochie, but her fingers now too. It was then Gertrude remembered wiping herself in the public toilet with the tissue from her pocket. The same tissue she had spit her gum into.
Alternative titles for this blog: Wrigley's Wax job, and Bubble Gum Brazilial.
5 comments:
Your just to funny my dear! You seriously need to get your butt back home cause we miss you! I love you, sweetie!
No, you need to get your butt back in writer's group! You would KILL at the event coming up...and I miss you.
So gross! So funny! Right up there with the story I heard at a Ladies' Night Out in Geneva where one woman had nowhere to put her used tampon, wrapped it in toilet paper and stuck it in her purse....forgot about it and then was asked to pull it out at the inspections counter in the airport. So gross. So true.
Ummm...since everyone else is asking....we could use your butt in Australia too! Miss you.
wow and you just promised me it was true. With these little tid bits of yours I feel well less of a weirdo myself..im not saying i can relate to these stories, heaven forbid!! ;)
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