I try my best to be a good farmer. My insta-grow sits dusty in my gift box. I know it contains nasty chemicals. My animals are free range. And all my poncho lamas and baby elephants were made from scoops of 100% organic feed. (I checked with the president of Farmville personally. Nice guy, round head, wearing an aviator’s cap – which I found a bit odd…) So now, I have quite a dilemma. Where to park my FritoLay’s chip stand and truck. I realize having this on my farm makes me somewhat of a hypocrite, but FritoLay is just so American, and I get so darn homesick. I wonder if I explained my situation to Zachary Zynga, (Yes, we’re on a first name basis) would he make a Tom Wahl’s stand, or better yet, a Pizza Land – complete with a tiny Barb-atar wearing a blue tee shirt covered in flour and splotched with tomato sauce. That would beat a FritoLay stand any day. I think I’ll waddle on over to my post office and send ZZ (only his closest friend call him that) a letter. I can check my winery while I’m over that way. My level 68 red table wine is almost ready. It would be mighty tasty with a large pepperoni, half mushroom pizza…
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